white's alright... for jenn

this is jenn, the witty friend/neighbor/talented photographer i talk about all the time.

cute, huh?

this is what goes down via email between us when jenn goes shopping:


jenn:  Lights workin?  (she kindly loaned me some fancy photography lights with umbrellas)


me:  who the hell knows???  my ass is on the sofa.  yours? 


jenn:  homegoods, baby.  it's 55.  get your ass out running.

me:  (um, who made her my personal trainer??)  okay. i'll JUST DO IT.  in a minute.  and stop spending $ on crap. (if she can be my personal trainer, i can be her financial advisor)

jenn:  i'm about balanced lighting and ambiance... need more lamps.

me:  (silence cuz... really?  more lamps?? i'm thinking she's "about" crap.)

jenn:  ... and what Type A sits on the couch?  during. the. day.

me:  (meanie.  thinking i need to change my phone number.  and email.  and wondering who the TRUE type a is in this conversation???)

jenn:  $60/ea otherwise I'd buy for headboard, or faux door!

me:   homegoods? (yes, $120 is outrageous to us since we share a hoarder, you know.)

jenn:  Antique place.  Screw homegoods. I love this place--wait till you see what I bought :))))

.....and here's where the story begins.

kinda feels good to see that she takes some crappy photos, too.

see, jenn did find a solid and totally useful piece of furniture on which to stand her tv and house it's wiry accompaniments; however, a closer look revealed some... slop.

i don't even like back-of-the-piece slop.  c'mon... did this "painter" have any respect?

no, that is not the only HAIR i found.  ew.... X 10.

really?  how hard aren't you looking if you miss this slobber dripping down one of the three sides you painted?

for a few minutes i smiled and nodded and told jenn what a great deal she got.  then i lost it and made her drop the bugger off at my house for a teeny, tiny tune-up.

just a once or twice-over with sandpaper.

or the orbital.

maybe some distressing to bring out the details hidden under the glop.

jenn departed to pluck her 4 year-old from preschool and i.... well...

have you ever, uh...gone a tidbit too far accidentally?

you know, lost yourself in the moment and forgotten that you were messing with someone else's somethin'?

... with chisels?

... and stripper?

really, the paint was gonna flake and peel anyway and i only hurried it along so i could peek around a bit and prevent a future mess in jenn's home.  lucky i did because i found some rather questionable ick under all those layers.  not good.  very peel-able in the future, right?

i plugged the orbital back in and ignored somehow missed jenn's emails about the pick-up time for the nowhere-near-done cabinet. 

but it was worth it...

 

how's that for snazzy grain?  

the inside was solid and untouched except for a few more drips... and it didn't even smell!

don't you love the edge detail?

at this point i lured jenn back to my studio to surprise her with my completely accidental discovery... and let her decide about the final finish while dangling some distracting coolio kuh-nobs from my anthropologie sale stash.

yes, we're still friends and yes, she says she loves it.

taaa-lucky-me-daaaaa!!

jenn went with annie sloan's old white chalk paint and i added pure white in with the clear wax for some spunk.  oh, and we kept the hot edges bare naked!!

i know, i know i said there would be no white in my future... but this is really jenn's future.  comprende?

and the kuh-nobs....holy, mother-of-pearl-moley!  have you ev-AH??  they've been sitting in my bucket for over a year awaiting their happy place.

"oh, happy, happy place! we love our happy place!" (that's the kuh-nobs singing)

tomorrow i'll post the shots with the kuh-nobs that came in second 'cuz this post is waaaaay babbly already.

but we have time to squeeze in one more peek at the kuh-nobs up close and personal...

hmmmm.  sigh.  i love it... even in white.


"oh, happy, happy place! we love our happy place!"